️ Trigger warning: This post includes mentions of self-harm. Please read with care. 

Working with teenagers, you never really know what to expect. One of my first big tests came out of nowhere—and it’s one I’ll never forget. 

One of my sweet girls messaged me and started opening up about some things she was struggling with. Then she told me something that made my heart drop: she had attempted to self-harm by cutting. 

Now, I have a confidentiality policy with all my kids, and I’m always upfront about it—with them and their parents. Anything they share stays between us, with three exceptions: 

1. If someone is abusing them in any way 

2. If they are abusing someone else 

3. If they are harming themselves 

This was one of those exceptions. 

But I didn’t want to break her trust. I was still at work, so I told her: You have until I get off to tell your mom yourself—or I’ll be coming over to do it for you. 

She begged me not to. 

She told me she’d never talk to me again. 

She said “If you love me, you won’t do this.” 

She swore it would only make things worse. 

I told her the truth: It’s because I love you that I’m going to tell your mom. 

As much as I wanted to be the one to fix everything, I couldn’t take her to counseling. I couldn’t get her the kind of help she truly needed to heal. I could be her support, but I wasn’t her legal guardian—I had limitations. 

So when the workday ended, I drove straight to her house. I had a private conversation with her mom and told her everything. 

And that was just the beginning. 

From there, we started counting days together—days she made it without hurting herself. I cheered with her at every milestone: 

• One week. 

• One month. 

• One year. 

Yes, there were relapses. But she kept going. She kept fighting. She didn’t give up. 

To say I’m proud of her doesn’t even begin to cover it. 

She was brave. She still is. 

If you or someone you love is struggling with self-harm or suicidal thoughts, please know that help is available. Call or text 988 for free, confidential support. 

You are not alone. You are deeply loved