There are moments in life when the hardest thing to do is the right thing. Years ago, I found myself at one of those crossroads: do I stay in the tension and drama just to be near my kids, or do I step away to protect them from the harm and chaos they were being dragged into? 

A situation arose where the kids I loved—my girls—were being placed in the middle of something they never should’ve been involved in. Suddenly, the way I was loving and supporting them was being called “inappropriate.” Not because of anything wrong I’d done, but because I wasn’t the “right” person in the eyes of some. Meanwhile, others in leadership were crossing far blurrier lines—but that was tolerated because of who they were. 

Let me tell you what I was doing for those girls: 

They came to my house often. I showed up at their ballgames. I answered texts and calls when they needed help, or just someone to listen. I tutored them. Took them out for ice cream. Led Bible studies in my living room. I loved them deeply, and their families fully supported the way I was pouring into their daughters’ lives. 

But then it reached a point where the church was going to force the kids to choose—me or another leader. 

I wasn’t about to let them be caught in that tug-of-war. I would never make my kids choose. So, I stepped away. I left the church. 

Even after that, I stayed in touch. I never stopped showing up. I continued to love them, encourage them, and remind them of their worth in Christ. 

Later, when the pastor who stirred up the drama moved on, several kids asked me to come back. But by then, I had found a new church home—a place where God was using me to love and mentor even more kids. 

It wasn’t easy. Leaving broke my heart. The drama hurt. But I would do it all over again to protect the ones I love. Because you don’t mess with my kids. You don’t use them as pawns. And you certainly don’t make them choose between love and leadership. 

I chose to protect them. 

I chose peace over presence. 

And I’d make that choice again, a thousand times over.